Strawberry Letter: Is it That Bad to Sleep with Dad?
Dear Steve and Shirley,
Hello. First off I would like to say I really enjoy your show. I also enjoy that your advice ALWAYS makes sense. Well, to make a long story short, I met and fell in love with this older man. I’m 28 and he is 44. We were seeing each other for 3 years when I decided to introduce him to the family. We had a birthday party for a family member that I brought him to, it was more like a “reunion.”
Anyway as soon as we walked in my aunt screamed, “Oh My God, what is HE doing here? How did she find him?” Looked like she had seen a ghost. I’m looking confused, my boyfriend is looking confused and then he says, “Hi Girl, what’s wrong with you, what do you mean how did she find me?” My aunt pulled him to the side, by now my mother has come over and she starts crying. I’m SO confused, my boyfriend is SO confused and looks dazed. He and my aunt talk while my mother takes me in to the restroom and reveals that he is my dad. That they had gotten together one night after a game and that she became pregnant and never told him (she even transferred schools because she went to another state to live with my great-aunt during the pregnancy).
After I nearly had a mental breakdown, I walked out the bathroom to find “dad” and he was gone. I tried to contact him to no avail for 3 months, I was confused but IN LOVE, we had 3 years together. After about 8 months he came to my house. He told me he had been receiving counseling but could not overcome his love for me as his girlfriend. Since we had no DNA to prove paternity, we got back together. My cousin “Q” continues to ask me, “Why do you want this man?” I get what he’s saying but I DIDN’T KNOW…WE DIDN’T know. We did not, could not believe this was true so we decided to take a DNA test in July. I had the results sent to my sister “C” and it has shown 99.8% accuracy. We were devastated. But now we have had 3 years and an additional 9 months together (after the separation).
We practiced restraint since July and decided to try to have a dinner together a 2 days ago to discuss how we would move forward as father/daughter, but we slipped up and our passion took over. We don’t FEEL like father/daughter. After the encounter, we even discussed moving to another state to be together, but it’s not practical. I know we are wrong but HOW DO WE MOVE ON? We will always be in love. This is breaking our hearts and driving us crazy.
Is it THAT bad to sleep with dad (since we didn’t know)? HELP ME!
Listen to Shirley and Steve comment on this letter below: